What difference a day makes!

Yesterday I wrote,"Hmm...is Angeline avoiding me? She has not returned my SMS's and calls over the last few days."

Well...I finally figured it out! We exchanged a few e-mails last night. And I discovered that she did not check her handphone and that was why she did not reply. Even more than that, she explained that she had been waiting for me to call her and that she was feeling kinda disappointed when I did not.

I am really not sure how or what to say about what we discussed last night here at this moment of time but I think that she is a wonderful girl and would like to get to know her better if you know what I mean. We went out twice and both times it went really well.

But I have a couple of reservations if I do intend to pursue a less than platonic relationship with Angel. The first one is that she comes from a well to do family. I worry that I might not be able to provide her the lifestyle that she has become accustomed to. My second reservation is the discrepancy in our education level. I do not want to have to go through again the things that I went through with Joyce where Joyce nagged continually for me to upgrade myself and to look for better career prospects outside of AVA. So far Angeline has proven to be unlike what I fear but if I recall Joyce once said the same thing and look what happened in the end.

I just want someone who can accept me for what I am, warts and all. I do not want to have to undergo a dramatic makeover just to be acceptable to my other half. It is not that I do not have dreams or goals that I want to achieve in my life. It is that what I want out of life is not fame nor fortune. But more someone that I can share my ups and downs with. A happy and fulfilling family life. I do not want to work my life away and regret never having said or done all the things I wanted to with my loved ones.

Another highlight today was that I gave Gloria a lift today after work. I noticed her looking at the lamb on my dashboard. She even gave it a gentle grope. I am gonna have to ask her about that the next time i see her. As it turns out she lives in Hillview not Jurong as Hasli alluded to the last time. So much for being a trusty informant. No year end bonus for him. :P

I really do not know what to do now actually. I really do like Angeline but commiting myself to a steady relationship may not be the best thing for me right now. I still do think that there is still a glimmer of hope between me and Joyce. The holiday in Bintan only re-inforced that belief. I really do treasure my relationships with Lyn and Nadia too. I do not want some girl telling me that the both of them cannot call me, SMS me or meet up with me because she feels insecure and cannot cope with the 'competition'. The new development between me and Gloria also throws a spanner in the works. I have only just begun to get to get to know her. I would like to get to know Gloria a little better before I can say if we have anything to build upon to make it to the next level.