Caught in a moment

I never thought you were a fool
But darling look at you
You gotta stand up straight
Carry your own weight
These tears are going nowhere baby

You've got to get yourself together
You've got stuck in a moment
And now you can't get out of it

Don't say that later will be better
Now you're stuck in a moment
And you can't get out of it


I received some feedback from some (read: Lyn) that my blog tends to be rather depressing. I guess that would be true due to my state of mind in recent months. I have been having problems at work, at home, my situation with Joyce and all. So I think I have lost that sparkle in the eye and the passion for things that I used to have. And more than anyone Lyn should know how much I am hurting now.

I used to be so easy-going and fun loving before. But now I tend to keep to myself and seem to be in a spiral of depression. I do not sleep or eat well anymore. I hit out at people who get on my nerves. I become impatient at others shortcomings. I do not have that same drive or passion for my work as I did before.

I guess the only person who can get me out of this rut I am in is me. I have to get myself back on my feet and find myself once again.

Chinese New Year blues

It is the first day of CNY and like every other year I am at home just wondering what to do. Being that I do not celebrate it and most of the people I love most do kinda makes it the loneliest time of year for me. All the shops are closed, many restaurants are as well. I was due to go to Bali but decided against it in the end.

It is not that I have nothing to do. I am supposed to work on a couple of articles for my church mag and I have yet to do the required research even. I do not even feel like doing it. I have decided to leave the publication ministry. The reasons being that I do not feel that I can commit the necessary time to do research and write articles. As much as I enjoy writing and reading, somehow being a writer for the publication ministry has not been as fulfilling as I had hoped it to be. It is in the best interests of all parties if I stopped. I think I have too many other distractions that keep me busy after hours and during work time I am too busy to sneak in any work in regards to my articles unlike some of the other writers who can get leave and time off to do their stuff.

I recently went to yahoo! auctions and purchased a Brand New Pentium 4 celeron 2.4 GHz PC at $610 which I consider a good deal. My current PC is kinda slow in loading and all now so it makes sense to upgrade it.And *horror of horrors* it cannot play Black Hawk Down!!

Things to do over the CNY Weekend:

- clear my email (i have like email from 2001 and my memory limit is 6MB and I am hovering close to the 85% level now)

- clear the SMS's in my hp (so many sms that I dunno which to keep and which to delete)

- go to the zoo (a fine time as any to go where I always wanted to go but never had the time to)

- watch the Last Samurai (heard that it is Oscar worthy...blah...blah...blah...)

- re-do my fish tank(s) (still deciding wat to put in though)

- do research and write articles for church mag

- clean my room (getting rather untidy,lacks a woman's touch :P)

I wonder if Nadia is free though. We been saying for what seems like forever to meet up but solid plans never materialised. Muffin is back home. I am at home. And I assume Nadia is too. So if you are there Nadia,do drop your dear brother here a line.

Lyn has decided that her treat for passing her driving test will be a feast in JB. Woo-hoo.....Esoof knows some places for really good food at really good prices. Lyn is so nice to everyone....